Give Me A Reason To Live
by AnimeKeepsBreathing
Summary: Cody is now an emo-failure, who is broken in more ways then one. When Zack tries to help him, it ends up with blossoming beauty.
1. Cody

**!!*STORY START*!!(Lemony Chapter)**

* * *

"Zack, honey, do you know where Cody is?," Carrie asked, walking into the hotel room. She slid off her rings and other jewelry items on the table and then walked over to the fridge, opening it. She searched for the apple pie she had made the night before, but only to find it had all been eaten.

"How the fuck would i know where that Emo fuck is?," Zack retorted angrily, his thumb slamming down on the channel button as rage swelled up inside him.

"Now zack!," Carrie exclaimed. "Cody is just going through a phase, im sure he'll be back to normal soon."

Zack's eyes narrowed. She didn't know. She hasn't seen the marks on Cody's precious body. "He comes home late, he's fucking _failing_, he's dropped all of his dork clubs, and have you _seen _the clothes he wears?"

Carrie grimaced, and she pulled out a bag of lettuce, setting it on the counter cutting board. She took a knife and started carefully cutting it, her finger nails tucking into her palm so the wouldn't get cut off. "He's just going through a phase, baby. It's okay."

She was trying to make it seem like the world was a rainbow. She wanted to believe that it was just a time in Cody's like when he was......hormonal. "The skinny jeans and stud belts look cute on her frame," she said, and her eyes widened.

Zack zapped the t.v off, throwing the remote to the ground. "HER?!?," he yelled at his mother.

Carrie blushed. "Oh, sorry, Zackey. I was just thinking of London and Maddie," she lied quickly.

Zack hmf'ed, slouching deeper into the couch.

The door opened, and Carrie looked up from her now salad bowl, setting down the ranch dressing. Zack didn't bother looking up.

A sixteen year-old skinny-framed male walked in. He had the Emo cut; his hair was black with blood-red on top. The chains on his purple skinny jeans swayed as he walked in, and he didn't bother taking of his black jeans. The male had (bruised) pink lips that glimmered with lip gloss that had _tried _to go over the rough cuts that indented the beautiful pink tissue. A simple, weak amount of eyeliner and mascara hung over Cody's eyes—and Zack could tell it had been re-applied recently(there were faint streaks down the males pink cheeks) Cody pulled his tight grey and black stripped jacket closer, and he shuddered.

And oh god, he was fucking sexy. Actually, he was sexy _and _cute.

It depended on his mood.

"Hey mum," he said, walking into the kitchen. He smiled kindly. Cute mood. "Is there anymore shrimp?"

"Sorry, hun, no. But you can order some if you like."

Carrie had been more open to ordering out now that she made _extremely _well money.

"Nah, no t-thanks." His 'thanks' cracked due to a pain that racked up his spine when he shook his head. He winced, and quickly turned away, striding over to the bathroom and slamming the door shut and locking it.

Carrie raised an eyebrow, and then shrugged, eating another peace of lettuce.

Zack starred at the television, angry.

Finally, he stood up, stretched, and walked over to the phone, typing in the Room Service number.

"Room Service?" came Maddie's sweet reply. She worked Room Service when she had free time, just for the extra money.

"Can you get me a shrimp cocktail plate, and a raspberry pie," Zack said, knowing she would do it even if he hadn't put the 'Can you' part.

He heard Maddie's tone change. "Do you want anything, Zack?"

Zack shook his head, then thought about it, and nodded. "Sweet and sour chicken."

Maddie hmm'ed. "Okay...."

Zack was about to hang up but the abrupt call of his name told him not to. "Yes?," he asked.

"Zack....don't you think if Cody wanted food _he _would call?"

"Well Maddie, don't you think if he didn't want the food he wouldn't finish it every night?," Zack retorted icily.

"Gah....sorry Zack, i didn't mean to sound rude."

Zack nodded. "It's okay, bye." And he hung up.

"Im going to go piss," Zack informed his mom, walking over to the bathroom.

He opened the door and then shut it quickly.

He looked over to Cody who was slowly sliding into a bathtub filled with ice cubes. His arms were tense as they held him up from going all the way into the ice water. His head was thrust back and he was biting his lip, his eyes pressed together tightly in pain.

He didn't bother to look over when the door opened, just kept trying to drown all his sores and bruises and cuts and whip marks.

Zack sat down on the edge of the tub, looking to his brother's nude, torn, and ripped body with soft eyes. "Are you okay?," he asked.

Cody didn't reply, just slowly slid an inch more into the water. Finally, his brother was officially submerged into the ice block water, and he rested his head back on a towel pillow, his eyelids lightening up.

It was silent, and Zack simply stared at his brother.

Finally, he sighed, looking away—to the marble sink, in fact. "......How long are you going to go on like this?"

"....I don't know."

"Are you going to tell me who's doing this?"

"There's a list. I don't even know half of them, because they blindfold me."

"So your not even going to fight?!"

Cody's eyes topaz eyes snapped open, and Zack could see the rage in them. "You try doing what im doing, Zack! I _do _fight. I protest like a fucking gay mafia, but that still doesn't make them stop! That actually makes them get bigger."

Zack grimaced. "You're an idiot. We should get the cops on their asses."

"Just shut up and go away, i don't want your damn pity. You've never cared about me; I'm an outcast. Either im a dorky geek or I'm a Emo fag prostitute." Cody's eyelids had nestled over his eyes once more, and it became silent.

"You shouldn't talk about yourself that way," Zack murmured. He lightly grabbed Cody's chin, lifting his face up. Cody opened one eye.

Zack pressed his lips softly against his now-barely-twin-like brothers. It was not really a kiss, and if it was, it was simple.

"I love you," Zack whispered, breaking apart from his brothers and looking into his tearful eyes.

_Diiiing-dooong_

"Foods here," Zack said. Then he stood up and walked out the bathroom.

* * *

Cody finished the last bite of his shrimp cocktail, and then pushed it away onto the table beside his bed. He let Carrie take his raspberry pie—simply because it was too much pain to lift a fork and chunk off a piece and then raise it into his mouth and then chew it with an abused tongue and swallow from a worn out throat.

Zack was sound asleep—just like his dear mother. Zack snored lightly, and all seemed peaceful.

A light wind passed through the two boys room, not really helping with the humidness.

Cody shuddered, pulling his blanket closer as he felt a prickly icy feeling overcome his body, sending his arm hairs on end.

He buried his head in his arms, resting his forehead on his knees.

'_You're a dirty man-whore slut, Cody, that's why we're fucking your tight ass_"

Tears slipped out of Cody's eyes.

* * *

Cody shoved his books in his locker quickly, frantic as can be. He had been late once more—his Car had given out once again.

No body was in the Halls, and now, he was the perfect target for the predators.

He couldn't have it happen again; not today. He had been worn out quickly the day before, and right now he was healing. Healing as much as he could.

Suddenly, arms wrapped around his waist, and he felt a hard lump press against his ass.

He dropped all of his books immediately, and they fell on his foot, sending painful pricks up his leg. He didn't respond to him—as it were, his heart had just failed to beat and his mind was yet to register anything else but horror.

"Hello, dear Cody," said a amused voice in his ear, followed by nips and licks.

"N-no....," Cody murmured, still unable to think clearly. "Not...no.....please....not today...."

Tears brimmed in his eye ducts as he felt a long, thin leather like object press against his throat.

A whip.

"We have some pay-back to get done now don't we?"

A cloth was placed over his mouth(and nose) and he gasped, taking in the fumes of what ever product was on it. He then became dizzy and tired, and he passed out in the Seniors arms.

* * *

Zack sat in his desk, slumped deep. He glanced at the empty desk beside him. He could of sworn it had accumulated dust in the long days of non-use. He wondered where Cody was.....

No, he didn't wonder, he _knew_. He was most likely getting raped in a bathroom or janitor closet.

His car had gone and blown, leaving him fucked. He should've stayed with Cody, not just gone off to class and leave him all out there, ready to get picked up. How could he've been so damn retarded!

Zack raised his hand.

"Yes?," the teacher asked.

"I feel sick, can i go to the nurse?" It wasn't a lie. He did feel sick. He could feel Cody's sickness.

"Write a pass."

* * *

Cody stirred, and his eyes blinked open. He could see faint prickly light through a darkness, and half of his cheeks and forehead and all part of his eyes was slightly warm—compared to the chillingness of his nude body.

He was blindfolded.

He felt his hands tied up tightly above him, and his ankles shared the same fate.

"No....," he murmured.

"Seems are little Cody is awake," someone said—known full well as Drew.

Suddenly, horrible twinges of pain racked his body. He then felt the object that had now completed his anus, and it vibrated, causing the frail boy to jerk and scream.

"N-no! Take it out! TAKE IT OUT!," He screamed frantically, whipping his head side to side and pulling on the ropes.

The ropes cut into his skin, causing the already cut skin to cut deeper, and hot liquid slid down his arms.

"Please!," he begged. "Take it out!"

Drew laughed at the boy withering in from of him on the desk. "No suck luck, bitch."

Cody whimpered and he felt him self harden at the harsh words.

He wanted rhythm. He wanted a real cock entering him.

Wait, no he didn't.

Cody screamed once more in protest, pulling harder at the bands. "Zack! Zack please help me!"

"Calling on your brother eh? Again? How slutty you bitch."

Cody ignored him. "No! Zack help me!" But his voice became weaker and weaker with each vocal. Tears cascaded across his cheeks, staining the sheets along with the blood. He felt pleasure and pain mix together inside him, and like salt over water, the pleasure was the come out.

After all, Cody was a masochist.

"Please.....please.....," Cody whispered desperately.

And his wish came true. The buzzing stopped and the false-completeness came out of him. It was silent.

Suddenly, his legs were ripped open widely, and a hardness was shoved inside him, sending him rigid.

He screamed in pain—it was like he was splitting in half. He didn't know who did it—after all he didn't mesmerize cock.

The person did not start slow and gently though—he went fast and hard, slamming inside Cody with greedy force.

A hotness pressed over Cody's cock, and it sucked up and down sickly—massaging his balls.

Cody's back arched, and he moaned, his eyes squeezing tightly shut—tears spilling over in pain and pleasure.

A hardness pressed against his mouth, obviously wanting to be sucked on.

Cody pressed his lips together tightly, not wanting to be a dirty slut.

Hands gripped his hair roots tightly, causing Cody's head to throb. He parted his lips when the guy1(the one that was penetrating him) hit _his _spot and when guy2(the guy who was sucking him off) did a slick move with his tongue and played with his slit.

Guy3(the guy he was now going to **** on) took the chance and shoved his member into Cody's mouth.

Cody screamed in protest but it was to late. It was in there.

And Cody.....he was.....he was horny.

Guy3 forced him to suck him by tightly grabbing his head and move it up and down his long, thick cock.

Cody moaned as tears sleeked down his cheeks and blood down his arms. With every movement he felt hotness and pleasure.

Soon, he was slamming against Guy1's cock, forcing his prostate to get his dead on. He groaned, bucking his hips to the mouth(G2) that was sucking him off perfectly. The hotness and tightness he felt as he slammed.......

Soon, Guy3 did not need to force Cody to do anything. He stopped gripping onto the black and purple hair and placed his hands on the males shoulders, his stomach already balled into a fist as he received the slutty pleasure.

"My nipples," Cody said breathlessly.

The three men smirked. Guy3 smiled widest and placed his fingers on the males nipples, jerking the rock-hard nubs and twirking them.

"T-talk dirty!," Cody screamed in pleasure.

They were already planning on that.

Guy1 thrust into him, hitting the soft spot inside Cody harshly and perfectly. "Your so tight you fucking slut! You feel so goooood. Ahh, your so tight, you bitch."

Guy3 twirked his nipples harder, massaging them deeply. "Suck my cock you fag. You bitch, suck my cock. You man-whore, you suck so good. Ahhh...my cock is so good. Do you this. Do you like sucking my cock while he's ramming into you and you scream in pleasure? Ahh your so good." (A/N: Apparently, it turns allot of guys on when you say 'sucking' and 'cock' allot 0.0 Ichigoorlelouch—has no clue why)

Cody replied by moving faster, his vision already gone.

Cody's back arched up, saying he was going to cum.

Sweet seed spilled into Guy2's mouth, and he drank it all up, climaxing right after.

Guy1's felt Cody tighten around his cock, sucking him in deeper and with a final thrust and a grunt, he got so deep inside the frail boys body and came deeply, screaming in pleasure.

Guy3 felt all the pleasure and the moans and all the sight of cuming caused him to thrust his head back and spill into the boys mouth.

Cody groaned. He drank up as much as the seed as he could(deciding to act like he couldn't taste anything). But still he couldn't drink it all up and it fell over the corners of his mouth where it formed rivers to his chin where it dripped off onto the desk.

And it was only moments later when he felt empty. Alone. Disgusting. Torn apart.

They stopped all that they were doing and all Cody could do was listen as they pulled up/on their paints and zipped up the zipper.

He thought it was over, thought it was done. But no, it was not done.

There was a _whoosh_ and Cody knew it before it hit: a whip.

He let out a scream when the leather slapped against his stomach. "NO!"

They laughed. All of them. Laughed at Cody's useless protests.

The whip came down repeatedly. Again and again, slashing up Cody's beautifully scarred body, causing blood to surface again and again—scars to open and form.

Cody bucked his hips at the pleasure seething his body, letting out loud screams. He might pass-out soon. Maybe in a minute. Maybe in thirty seconds. Maybe in this nano-second......

Finally, just before Cody was about to slip into the barrels of unconsciousness, it all stopped—right at the peak of Cody's climaxing point.

Cody did not make a reply to this though—just let it be. He didn't want to get hurt anymore. He didn't want to make his brother hurt anymore then he did. A hand patted Cody on the head, and three voices synchronized with "We'll be back"

There were three fast swipes and three equally fast tears, and then Cody felt the binds become loose.

All this was quickly followed by a door opening into the loud rain and then shutting in closing it off.

Cody curled up on the portable-classroom desk, promising himself to wake up when it was all better.

* * *

One-shot? Review

_Sorry for GRAMMAR MISTAKES and SPELLING ISSUES_


	2. Agony

**A/N**: I apologize for SPELLING MISTAKES and GRAMMAR ISSUES and OPPOSING INFORMATION:  
**Something To Make Known To The Reader**: I do not owe you this chapter ^_- Please Review.

* * *

**!!*STORY START*!!(Depressing Chapter)  
**

* * *

_I hate it. _

_This cold, horrible feeling. _

_It's burning me from the inside out. _

_I want it to go away._

_I run so far, so long. _

_My legs feel like they will fall off. _

_But somehow, they're right there. _

_And I've run nowhere. _

My heart pounds against my chest, and i find myself unable to breathe. I feel as though I've just run a six-mile marathon without stopping for anything. My breath comes out in hitched gasps and my throat is dry due to my mouth being open for so long, my tongue sticking out and not doing it's duty to caress the gums inside.

The razor which had been placed in my hand only minutes ago was now on the floor, having fell with three sounding 'clacks' as it skidded to a stop. The blade was dead strait out, and the tip was covered with blood.

So was my arm. And hand. Pain seethed in my wrist for it had a long gash slashed across it. Blood leaked out and over it, staining my skin.

My mind was cold and numb, so empty.

My eyes were most likely the same. I stared dully at the horizon which seemed so far away; too far away.

Clouds soiled the sky with their rich, dusty colors; pink and purple grazed the atmosphere, twisting in with a grey mass to form a swirling galaxy.

But then, through a single spot, lay a halo of light where a ring of the third giant star was gleaming. I remembered watching a cartoon-centric movie about a light like that. I couldn't remember the name, but i felt like it had to do something with death or an angel. So pretty it was; Mom says that when you see something like this, then your special and angels are surrounding the light.

But angels belong to god. And i don't believe in god.

I shifted my weight to the side; looking away from that 'honorable' sight.

I can smell the blood; so rich, so coppery. It's like an infection to my nostrils, but I'm so used to it. I think I'm addicted to it now. I can't go a day without smelling that smell, and my heart gives an extra long thump when it's recognized.

I can feel my brain dissolving into a blackness, and there's only one thought in my head.

_I hope i die._

* * *

It had been horrible. He had asked Cody to stay after school for help in Math. He had smiled so kindly at him and he had announced this in front of the whole class.

It wasn't the fact of being told in front of everyone that you, once an amazing student, had gone to the pits; so low that you even needed _help_ for it.

No, it wasn't that that angered him.

It was the point where he had said it in front of everyone so Cody would have to obey.

Cody couldn't deny it in front of everyone.

What made it worse was the look Zack gave him. That horrible, dreadful look of pity, worry, and remorse.

Something Cody never wanted in his whole life.

He didn't want anything that was happening to him right now. He just wanted to die.

Make the pain go away for good.

Close the wounds that ravaged his soul.

Of course, Cody had agreed with a nod.

But that hadn't been good enough. The teacher had specifically made Cody stand up after that.

Cody did, setting down his pencil which had only written two letters on the page. He stared at the desk, and he felt self-conscious from all of the gazes that had been put on him.

Some were confused, some were pitiful, some were smirks...

Cody could feel the smirk that was plainly written inside the teacher's mind. He didn't show it on his face, but he was so easily read.

Everyone was so easily read.

"I will not tolerate such behavior," the teacher said in a dull voice to every one but Cody. His voice was sinister. "Look at me in the eye and say 'yes sir', Mr. Martin."

Cody clenched his hands and grit his teeth. Slowly, he brought his glance up and looked at the teacher strait in the eyes. "Yes. Sir," he said through angry pauses.

"Good, now take your seat and don't disrupt my class again."

"YOU BASTARD!," Cody screamed.

The class gasped.

He found hands restricting him and he tried to struggle away. He wanted to hit the teacher. He was filled with so much boiling rage.

"Cody," a hush voiced, known as Zack's, whispered in his ear. Cody immediately stopped, slumped in defeat.

Then, he shoved Zack off him and sat down.

Cody had thoroughly despised his teacher for that incident.

But he hated him more for what he was going to do after class that day.

Cody found himself being tied down. His legs had been displayed wide, placed over the arm's of the chair. His ankles had been tied down to the legs. Cody's hand had been restricted behind him. Cody had been ordered to strip, and of course, he didn't....at first. He screamed and fought the teacher off, but his malnourished, weak body couldn't stand it.

He had been stripped clean and tied up to a desk.

What made it worse: It was his brother's desk.

His brother which he loved so much. His brother which he wanted to with beneath, be loved by, be kissed by. His brother which he knew would never care for him in a way Cody did for him.

It was so painful.

The teacher had forcefully stuck his tongue down his throat, and his breath tasted like smoke. Cody gagged on it, and he fought his hardest. He bit down on the teacher's tongue.

The man yelped, breaking away. "You bitch!," he screamed, slapping the boy.

Cody yelped in pain and hidden pleasure as a sensation breathed through his pores. But he didn't want this. He wanted Zack to slap him.

"I'm going fuck you 'till you scream!," the teacher growled. He grabbed Cody's legs and spread them wider. Then, he jammed his awaiting cock into Cody's anus.

The teacher shuddered at the tightness and heat he was consumed to.

He felt as though he would break in half with how tight it was, but the pressure felt so amazing against him.

Cody'd taken it all the way into the harry base of the man, but there was still space!

The man covered Cody's mouth to muffle the screams and pleas. Though they were so beautiful and made him relish in pleasure, he couldn't let any passing teachers get curious.

The teacher started slamming himself into Cody relentlessly, keeping a quick, and death-trap pace.

It was like he was drunk or high, and he kept mumbling things.

"Emo fuck...bitch....man-whore....slut....tight....hot....Lucy..."

Cody, through his agony, noticed the female name.

Lucy....

A little while later, the man came deep inside Cody before he pulled out. He left a sullen-looking Cody; he fixed himself right, grabbed his brief case and then fled from the room, leaving Cody still tied up.

Cody was glad the man hadn't gone any further, and he waited for Zack to come and rescue him.

._.

"Can you move?," Zack asked as he cut the ropes holding Cody back.

Cody's closed his lips, and then opened them as if to talk. But he didn't.

Cody blinked slowly, as if he was dazed, and then he shook his head once.

Zack sighed, and he felt a agonizing pain in his heart as he grabbed a box of tissue's and cleaned off Cody's pucker.

He was thoroughly _disgusted _with the thought of another man, a _teacher_, sperming himself inside Cody. He wanted to puke.

Zack refrained, and he through the tissues away quickly. He grabbed Cody's close and put them on Cody, moving the boys limp body around.

He could see the tears that stung in Cody's eyes. He could see the pain, the hurt, the guilt....

Zack wanted it all to go away. He wanted to see a happy, joyous Cody.

It's good to want, isn't it?(1)

Zack led Cody through empty hallways out to his car. He opened the door with his foot and placed Zack in the passenger seat. He buckled Cody's seat belt for him, and then got into the car too.

The ride home was silent as a graveyard.

Zack parked deep into the underground lot, and he carried Cody all the way to the door.

But that's where doting had to end.

Cody pushed himself on Zack, taking in a trembling breath.

Then, he walked through the doors. Cody grit his teeth together as he walked strait through the crowd of the hotel, looking strait ahead of him. His whole body ached and he wanted to collapse.

Suddenly, Moseby ran into Cody's shoulder.

At that weak hit, Cody found himself entering darkness.

Zack caught the boy quickly, haven been quickly behind him.

Yelps sounded through the hotel lobby, including Mr. Moseby's and Maddy's.

They ran over to the sixteen year old.

"Step back!," Zack warned, giving them a sharp glare.

The crowd that had surrounded them protested, but they stopped a second later.

"I said, GET AWAY FROM US!," Zack yelled at the top of lungs.

The room grew silent as a barren field, and they took a few shuffles backwards.

Zack picked up Cody bridal style, and he walked over to an elevator. He pressed the button with his foot, but Moseby dare not scold him.

The door opened with a 'bing!'

Zack put his foot through, then looked back to Moseby and Maddy and any friends that would even think of telling their mother.

He narrowed his eyes and gave them a sharp, cold glare.

_Don't tell_.

._.

"CODY!," Carrie screamed as she barged into the room. She was wrapped in a nice violet sweater and simple pants. Her eyes widened as she saw Cody on the couch, sleeping. There was a wet towel placed over his head, and Zack was sitting right beside him.

"What happened?!," Carrie said a little bit quieter, striding over the boy. She placed a delicate, half-veined hand on the boy's cheek, and immediately recoiled, noticing the heat. "Mr. Moseby told me that he collapsed in the lobby!"

_I'm going to kill you, Moseby_, Zack thought to himself. "He's sick," Zack said simply. "There's been a fever going through are school, so it's not something to worry about."

"But—"

"_Mom_."

Carrie stared into Zack's eyes, tears glistening, and then she nodded. "Okay," she said in a scratchy voice. She sniffed, standing up from her kneel and turning around, walking over to the kitchen.

"Okay."

* * *

Cody sat himself beside Zack's bed. It creaked softly into the night, but Zack failed to show any signs of waking.

Cody stared at his brother. He wanted to touch him. The way Zack shown in the night. In the light. Zack was beautiful all around. Cody lifted his hand of the covers and reached for his brother.

But...

Only inches away, Cody stopped. He tried to force his fingers to move, but his brain refused to send the orders.

Tears slipped out of Cody's eyes, and he quickly brought his hands to his face, sobbing hysterically.

His gasps and sniffs were music to the night, and the damp air relished in them.

Zack, already being awake to witness the whole thing, sat up. Cody noticed, but didn't say anything.

He just sobbed harder into his hands.

Zack wrapped his arms around Cody, pressing them tightly together.

"I love you," Zack whispered.

"No...," Cody replied, taking his hands away from his face and sniffing. "You don't Zack. You pity me. There is no true love in pity."

"I love you," Zack repeated.

"I love you. I love. You. I love you."

Cody's heart surged in pain and he cried in Zack's shoulder the hardest he has ever cried in his whole life.

That was it.

He wanted to disappear from the world.

* * *

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	3. The End

_Please Review; thanks for reading ^_^_

**

* * *

The End**

* * *

"Z-Zack...," Cody murmured as he found himself being tightly held against his older brother. His brother replied with a muffled moan, for he was sucking on Cody's neck.

Cody's mind, having a rather large fiesta(Olay! Move your ass ya stupid donkey!)went wild as his mind zoomed in on the noises and the feels.

His skin was a prickling hot, but goose bumps laced his skin. Waves of sensational pleasure coursed through his veins, ranging Cody on edge.

Cody arched his back as Zack's teeth gently nibbled is teeth, making it infuriated. His tongue would then smooth it out, and Cody would moan.

"Z-ack..."

Another incoherent noise. Cody's eyes began to droop, his mind going into a fog of pleasure and lust.......

"Zack!," Cody cried, pushing away from his brother. He fell to the floor with a harsh thump. He raised his head to look at his brother, tears glistening in his eyes from the harsh fall.

"Cody," Zack murmured, kneeling down to Cody and setting out a hand. "Please." His voice cracked, and Cody saw tears streaming down his cheeks. "Don't be afraid of me, Cody. Please. I love you....i love you so much."

For some reason, shock burst to life inside Cody. He had never seen Zack so passionate around him.

Zack was begging him.

_What have i become?_, Cody asked himself. _I'm a monster. _

"Please Cody," Zack pleaded again. "Please."

_Stop it_.

Cody curled up in a tight ball on the floor, bringing his knees to his chest, wrapping his arms around them and clutching them in. He stared at Zack's legs with wide eyes, rocking back and forth.

_Stop it. Stop begging me. Stop acting like I'm important and precious, Stop it. _

A large warm hand pressed on top of Cody's forehead, and Zack's thumb caressed the pale, cold skin. Zack was rendered speechless by this sudden turn, and wanted nothing but Cody to be alright.

"I'm sorry," he whispered softly. "I'm sorry."

It was all he could say to his brother, the only thing he could possibly utter to explain his feelings. He only said it twice; he didn't want to burden his already broken, worn brother.

Cody whimpered at Zack's touch, and his stomach clutched with each light caress. He nuzzled into the warm hand despite his feelings.

_Don't apologize_, he thought with a cracked brain. _I'm not worthy of it. I'm not worthy of you. I'm a monster. Can't you see that? _

"Z...ack...," Cody breathed, slowly sitting up. His eyes bored into Zack's, taking in the bright beauty of them.

He slowly captured Zack's hand and took it away from his forehead, setting it in his lap and holding it weakly.

_I owe this to Zack. Through all this pain and agony and self-conscious feelings that i have made him endure by himself, i must repay him for all my sinful deeds. _

"It's...okay, Zack," Cody murmured. "Please....make me clean."

Zack was momentarily shocked by Cody's words. Was Cody actually going to let him have him? Zack didn't know why he was so stunned; he had, after all, been asking for this. But half of him believed that Cody wouldn't let him in. Wouldn't let him dirty him anymore.

"Are you sure?," Zack asked lightly.

Cody nodded, though he didn't look at Zack when he did. He kept his eyes averted to the side of Zack, not wanting Zack to see the look in his eyes.

Zack pulled away from Cody's grip and captured Cody's face once again, cupping his cold, tear stricken cheek. He leaned in closer as he turned Cody's face to him.

Cody's eyes, embedded with all his emotions—pain, misery, guilt, shame, fear—stared weakly into Zack's strong ones. "Cody, look me in the eye and tell ne you want this. I don't want to hurt you anymore then i already have."

Cody's heart shattered into a billion pieces. He grabbed Zack's hand and ripped it away from his cheek, tackling his brother.

Zack landed with a harsh 'thump' on the floor, and Cody placed his hands on both sides of his head, his knees embedded into the carpet besides Zack's hips. Tears swam out of his eyes and splashed onto Zack's face. "Make me clean, Zack!," Cody all but screamed. "Make me yours! I want you to touch me! I want you to love me! _Please!_"

Zack stared at his sobbing brother, who was fighting with all his emotions to keep from screaming out into the night.

"I love you so much!," Cody cried in his silent sobs. "I love you so much!"

"Shhh, baby," Zack croaked, bringing up his hand and placing his fingers on his brothers cheeks as his thumb wiped away the water and salt perspiring out of Cody's tear ducts. "It's going to be okay, Cody. Shhh."

After many minutes, Cody's sobs subsided, and all that was left was little sniffs.

Carefully, Zack rolled over, changing their positions.

Cody lay underneath him, a low pink tint splashed on his cheeks.

His fingers laced the carpet beneath him, his purple nails clutching the thin, bristly fabric.

Zack straddled Cody's waist. His body was so skinny and fragile, broken so many times.

Zack had to heal it.

Cody's eyes, lay half open, stared dully at the wall beside him, awaiting the pleasure and pain he was sure to receive next.

"Do you want to close you eyes, Cody?," Zack asked lowly.

Without a nod, Cody's eyelids slid over his eyes, sealing them.

Zack didn't mind. Zack ran a hand along the long, white button up shirt that covered Cody's chest. It was too long for him; it went almost all the way to his knees. The sleeves went out a few inches away from his fingertips. The large, black buttons were off; two, one in the middle and one at the bottom, weren't even conjoined with the rest of the shirt.

Zack couldn't help but smile at that, even given the sobber situation.

He slowly unbuttoned them with one hand as his other reached behind him, gently touching Cody's inner thigh.

Cody tensed, and Zack froze. Slowly but surely, Cody relaxed again, giving Zack the 'go' sign.

Zack finished unbuttoning Cody's shirt, though he had stopped rubbing Cody's inner thigh.

He had no right to be harsh with his brother. He had to be gently as the wind.

Cody leaned up and disarmed the too-long shirt—most likely something of their father's.

Cody leaned back down, but this time his eyes were open. His hands rested above his head, even though nothing was binding them there.

He looked like a lost soul kind of...

Scars and bruise marks raped Cody's chest. Large, reached imprints that showed the use of other bodies on him.

Zack secluded himself in Cody's neck, gently nibbling on his skin. Light gasps of pain and pleasure released from Cody's mouth.

The front of Cody's forehead went numb with pleasure, though his head was making out every single detail of his lover on him. The warm, sticky saliva that was damping his skin; the scratchy, soft surface of a tongue; the hard, yet gently nibbles by the teeth on his pale skin.

Cody could feel the hardness pressed against his waist, rubbing against it softly.

Zack kissed down Cody's chest. Butterfly kisses on each place he had been marked; each place he had been used.

His skin was covered with them.

The kisses were gentle and free, and they were quick. But they lasted for eternity.

With each press of Zack's moist lips on Cody's skin, his mind has a spasm.

Zack's hands ran up and down Cody's sides taking in his body. He was finding it hard to be so caring with this body, but he knew he had too.

As Zack made his way around Zack's chest and stomach, he got a full view of how unnourished the body was. Cody's abs sucked into his stomach, and you could see many of his ribs. It made Zack's eyes sting. Cody's body, such a beautiful pale, luminescent color, was being ravaged.

Cody, who had been looking down, murmured, "Sorry...i know I'm not beautiful...."

Zack shook his head. "No, Cody, that's not it. I'm just reviling in your gorgeousness."

Cody's cheeks blazed bright pink, and he leaned back down, a pout-like expression on his face.

Zack smiled, and his tongue penetrated Cody's bellybutton.

Zack was not ready for Cody's next action.

Cody helped, and his back arched like a whip, hitting Zack in the nose.

This cause Zack to curse, grabbing on his nose.

"Oh god!," Cody cried, hitching himself on one elbow and using a hand to cover his dropped mouth. "I am so sorry!"

"No, no, Cody. It's fine. I didn't realize you were so sensitive there," Zack replied.

Cody flushed crimson and then laid back down; Zack too, went back to his deeds.

Zack's tongue found it's way to Cody's navel, and he carefully approached. He swirled his tongue around the indent, showing a suggestive manor to Cody. Cody whimpered, readying himself for the penetration of an unknown sweet spot.

You would think someone would notice—they had actually. Many occasionally brushed against it, and when they noticed Cody's reaction, would become curious. They had actually came really close to it; some bite marks were only a few inches away. But none of them hit the spot.

Unlike Zack.

Cody let out rather loud gasps and his eyes bulged when Zack's tongue caressed his naval. His tongue, so slick inside the whole, wettened the area.

Cody put a hand over his mouth, staring at the ceiling though not really taking the sight in.

All he could feel was Zack and his body.

"G-good...," Cody choked out through his parted fingers. "S-so g-good...."

Zack smiled. He was bringing pleasure to his brother. Not brutal, forced pleasure, but gently, soft spasms of emotion that sent Cody on edge.

As Zack was suckling on Cody's indented skin, he noticed something rather odd.

There was something hard and off inside the surface. It wasn't a bump—you could move it around. That's when he realized what it was.

A piercing.

Yes, a nub was planted _inside _Cody's naval.

Zack parted from Cody's stomach, and he brought a finger up, pulling at the skin below Cody's belly button. Cody's skin stretched out, and Zack was revealed to a tiny black spud.

Zack glanced up to Cody, who was staring at him with hazy eyes.

Zack shrugged and then attacked Cody's navel again, ignoring the jolt.

As he got harder, he received louder moans that were being muffled by Cody's hands.

Zack then got a quiet whimper when he pulled away.

"Don't worry," he whispered huskily in Cody's ear. "I'll make you feel better soon.

"Hah..."

Zack smiled and he leaned back, his eyes landing on the colossal bulge in Cody's pants.

"I-I've never...gotten so b-big in my life...," he herd Cody murmur quietly. And it was the truth. Through all the rape and abuse and torture Cody had received, never—_never_—had he ever gotten so hard.

Why did he get this way for Zack? Why did his body act like this for someone he knew he could never have. Cody could never have anyone. He was used and broken. Dirty. He _deserved _no one. Especially not the one he truly cared for.

Zack carefully pressed his fingers on it, but obviously not careful enough.

One of Cody's hands zipped down and slapped Zack's away rapidly, covering his crotch. He stared at Zack with wide eyes—eyes filled with horror.

He slowly shook his head, his eyes never leaving Zack's.

_I can't do this_, they said. _I can't_.

"Cody," Zack murmured, his hand slipping onto Cody's.

Cody shook his head more roughly this time, tears staining his eyes. _I can't! I can't! Your going to hurt me!_, his eyes screamed.

"Cody..." Zack gently grabbed Cody's hand and slowly moved it up to his face. He nuzzled it, his eyes lowering.

Cody stared and shock for a few minutes, and then his mind had a small reclination.

_Zack would never hurt me. I'm the one who is hurting Zack, not the other way around. Zack...I'm so sorry. Please forgive me._

Cody gruffly nodded once, allowing Zack to continue. He took his hand away, setting it beside him.

Zack smiled inwardly, running his hands down the smooth, yet scarred body of his brother once again. As he did so, he noticed Cody getting harder and harder with each caress. Cody's nipples were so puckered up they looked as though they would fall off.

Zack ran his tongue along his lips, and he noticed his throat was dry. He gulped, and then leaned down, brushing his lips along the puckered pink nubs.

"Ah!," Cody moaned loudly, his legs scrunching up against Zack's bag and his hands zooming to Zack's head. He clenched tufts of Zack's hair as the boy flicked his nipple with his tongue.

"Shhh," Zack warned quietly. "Don't wake mom."

Cody whimpered. Even though his mom was a deep, deep, _deep _heavy sleeper, they couldn't risk any chances.

Cody gripped Zack's blonde hair, digging his nails into the boys scalp.

His body tensed at the feeling of Zack's skillful tongue licking him.

_So sensitive_, Zack thought. _No wonder they pray on him. Monsters, all of them. _

Zack circled the base of Cody's gland before he dove into the prick, nibbling at it softly.

"Oh—god—oh—ahm!" Cody bit un his lip to keep from screaming, and his knees pushed into Zack's side.

Zack, far to into the moment to notice the pain accumulating in his side areas, attacked Zack's nipple. Of course, he climbed up Cody's stomach until he reached Cody's other gland. Taking it between his thumb and index finger, he rotated it, pinching it between his skin ever so often.

Cody's head jolted to one side, and then jolted to the other, completely loss in pleasure.

_He's only teasing me_, Cody thought, _but he's got me so turned on_.

Zack licked and fondled Cody's nipples until he was sure Cody could not take the teasing any longer.

They wouldn't want Cody to come right there, wouldn't they?

Zack smiled to himself as he flicked the button, not even having to twist it and pull it through. A light tap of the finger was enough to send it flying open. Zack went lower amongst the frail, unnourished body.

He took the zipper between his teeth and slowly spread it down.

Cody had to force himself not to buck his hips in the pleasure of watching his brother do all these menstruations to him.

But what Zack did next sent Cody's mind wild.

Zack sluggishly pulled off Cody's lounge-pants until they pooled at the bottom of Cody's feet. He ran his fingers against the budge in Cody's _briefs, _though careful to be light enough on the pressure that he forced.

Cody let out a strangled moan, sending Zack off the edge.

Zack spread Cody's legs apart, grabbing them by then inner thighs and setting them upon his shoulder. Then, he nuzzled Cody's underwear, his tongue lacing on the already damp fabric. Cody had become _so _wet, and Zack had to get it.

"Yes!," Cody groaned in pleasure, bucking his hips in pleasure. Zack sucked through the underwear, his tongue prodding the bulging surface.

Zack closed his eyes, and then reopened them. He leaned back, and he herd Cody whimper at the loss.

Zack slid off Cody's underwear, revealing a hard-on cock floating high in the air. Scars maned it, wrapping around it.

They had used many toys on it.

"I know it's not—"

"Shhh."

Cody immediately shut up, turning a deeper shade of red. His eyes diverted to the ground, and he waited for the gentleness heaven that he would never deserve.

Zack suddenly grabbed Cody's wrists, and he placed Cody's hands on top of his shoulders.

Cody looked at him, confused.

"Slap my if you want me to stop, okay?"

Cody nodded. "...alright..." Cody lightly rested his hands on Zack's back, waiting.

Zack took the base of Cody's cock, gazing at the large pink erection.

_So beautiful and delicate_, he thought. _The scars that mare can't even deny it's perfect beauty_.

Zack then fisted Cody's cock and gave a slow...steady..pump.

Cody's back arched at the feelings, his nails dug into Zack's back.

"M-more..." Cody bit his tongue.

Zack, once again, did another stroke, taking it carefully. He didn't want to frighten his brother away. Cody was finally grasping the feeling; finally trusting Zack to care him.

Cautiously, Zack engulfed the head of Cody's member.

Cody practically _screamed. _Even though his hands muffled it, it wa still very loud. Cody bit down on his lip hard, his fingers stretching Zack's skin so far that it started to rip.

Zack moaned, caressing the tip of Cody's cock with his tongue. Then, to pleasured to care, he did a sudden dive, taking in all of Cody.

Cody actually handled better then expected; he thrust his head back, tightening his hips.

Zack mingled there, just wanting to feel Cody's hardness pressed against the back of his throat.

Cody swam in the pleasure of the heat that engulfed him whole. His fingers un raveled themselves from Zack's skin, twitching before they reclaimed the area.

Zack knew he couldn't wear a wife beater tomorrow with those kind of scarring marks.

Cody was immersed in the heat and dampness of Zack mouth; the spongy surface of his tongue that lightly played with him.

Believing himself to be ready, Cody slid out of Zack's mouth slowly. Chilling air crashed down on Cody's erection, sending him gasping. Once he was all the way to the tip, he glided back in at the same speed. He shuddered at the feeling of being sucked in again.

Never had Cody taken things so slow and cautiously....it was different and weird.....but it felt so good.

Cody didn't know what Zack wanted next. Did Zack want to suck him, or did Zack want him to fuck his mouth?

It was so confusing, and Cody's dizzy mind was not helping at all.

But Zack came in answers, shedding light upon the situation. He pushed down Cody's hips with the ball of his hand, the tips of his fingers drumming against his skin.

He pulled up Cody's cock, and then went back down again, a moan escaping from his lips as he felt the longness glide through his lips.

Zack did this two more times until he stopped doing the long stride and sucked on the tip of Cody's cock. He marveled in the sweet taste perspiring out. His tongue spread the pre-cum around, also savoring in the texture of it. Then, he went back down, repeating this action.

Cody withered beneath him, letting out silent gasps of pleasure and unexplainable emotions. Bursts up bright color and feelings and details that he had never made out in sexual menstruations appeared before him, sending him off the chain.

Even though Zack was taking him so slow and easily, he felt _good_. He loved the feeling of Zack savoring him; his tongue gliding along his stiffness. He loved the warm, yet chilling breath that floated upon him. He loved the tight, compact cavern of Zack's mouth.....

Zack could feel the deep thrusts Cody was pulling off against his hands, urging him. Zack's tongue penetrated the tight slit at the tip of Cody's cock as his other hand squeezed the base of Cody's cock in reliance.

Cody moaned and rolled his hips. Cody found his hands slipped off of Zack's shoulder.

One clamped onto Zack's head, the other lay astray across Cody's face.

"More," he murmured as he pushed Zack's head down deeper.

Zack groaned into his cock, sending Cody off the edge of existence.

Zack did another round of sucking before he stopped. He lightly licked the tip of Cody's cock once, and then blew on it lightly.

Cody's legs, which were successfully wrapped around Zack's back, tightened more and Cody sucked in a wad of air.

Zack once again engulfed his cock, and Cody was finally starting to feel the tightness start tightening in his stack.

He dug his nails into Zack's scalp, gasping shortly as he waited for his releases.

"Zack....! Ahh! Ahh! NnNN! Aa! Mm!!! ahh!"

Cody's moaning fetish strangled out his lips as he came deep inside the back of Zack's throat.

Zack gulped all Cody had to offer, which was apparently _allot_. But Zack started to become addicted to the sweet, honey like flavor, and began wanting more and more. He didn't want this waterfall of delicious taste to leave him. It sent him to cloud nine.

Zack sucked him clean, not letting one drop slip away.

When he was done, he pulled back, licked his lips to take in any excess that could've possibly gotten away.

Cody stared at him with glossy eyes and cheeks as vivid as roses.

_So beautiful....._, Zack thought with unsteady thoughts.

The two of them had uneven breath that was slowly syncronizing with a calm factor after many minutes.

"Z-Zack...,"Cody uttered, and Zack could make out the lusty, needing look in his eyes.

Zack understood the look immediately.

_Fuck. Me. _

The two words, so lightly said in sex, yet so dangerous and serious in their situation.....

Suddenly, Cody scooted away from him, surprising the twin-who-doesn't-look-much-like-the-other-twin-anymore.

Cody, knowing full well what he was suggesting, grabbed the inner side of his thighs and spreading his leg out, revealing his pucker.

Zack stared at Cody's entrance, and couldn't help but lick his lips unconsciously.

Cody's hole was contracting—squeezing itself tightly together in a nice compress, and then undoing itself at the same speed. It was bright pink, flushed with a gorgeous splash of Vibrant colors. The bruises that raped it held no meaning, it was like they weren't even there.

That certain area was wet, making each contracting motion show a sticky substance spreading and then breaking.

"This area needs your cleaning the most," Cody called quietly. He tapped it lightly with the pad of his middle finger. "Make me feel only your hot cock inside me. Make me only feel your hot semen sperming inside me."

Both of them were turned on fully by Cody's words, and Zack was rendered speechless.

_What should i do?_

It was what Cody said last that broke Zack in.

"Please."

It was like he was begging to a god. As if he was on his knees, his hands outstretched in front of him, and tears streaming down his face.

He was actually _begging _Zack to be inside him.

Zack breath hitched, and he crawled over to the boy, taking his thighs away from his hands. Cody placed his hands beside him to support him so he wouldn't fall.

"Are you sure?," Zack asked huskily, a bright gleam in his eyes.

Cody froze. Was he sure? Was he ready to be entered by the one he knew he would never have? Knew he shouldn't be loving but loving anyway?

No, Cody wasn't ready. Not ready at all.

But he nodded anyway.

"Yes," he replied, hushed.

Zack blinked slowly, and then he brought the fingers to his mouth, ready to start a lubrication effect.

But Zack's hands were snapped out by weak ones.

Zack stared at he felt his fingertips press against Cody's tender, bruised lips.

Then, they slipped through Cody's lips into Cody's damp, burning hot mouth.

Zack cursed in his mind and he thrust his head back. Cody's tongue...so experience and skillful.....

Cody's tongue lapped over Zack's fingers, heedful to not let his teeth brush up against them. Saliva caked on Zack's fingers, and when Zack couldn't take it anymore, he pulled away.

He spread Cody's legs once again, placing his saliva-slicked fingers at the hole.

He glanced up at Cody, who had his head back, and eyes shut tightly, ready for the penetration.

Zack took a large breath and started massaging the area, wanting it to be as soft and relaxed as it could be.

He rubbed up against the side, weakening the tight forces that camping it. When he was sure it was as soft as butter, he sild his finger in.

Cody jolted when he felt Zack's finger entering him, but forced himself to stay calm.

Zack was being attacked by lava and tightness as he slowly slipped his finger in.

He closed his eyes as he found himself at the base of his finger, and he was nestled deep inside Cody.

_Such heat...._

Zack slid back out, only to add another finger. It took longer fo Cody to become accustomed to this, and Zack had to constantly stop and wait. No complaining though; it was an honor just to be able to _touch _Cody.

Then, both fingers were fully inside Cody, resting in the baking heat and compressing tightness.

With measured moves, Zack spread is fingers apart as best he could, and then closed them back together. He did this again, spreading them apart to strechen the area before they snapped back together.

Zack prepared Cody with a leisurely slowness, though Cody was fine with it. He was n't used to.....being prepared. Actually, no one had _ever _prepared him in his whole life.

It would just be a flat out ram.

But Zack was treating him so gently...so nicely.

Cody deserved none of it.

As Cody basked in the odd pleasure for a while moments later, he was unsure what he felt when Zack parted.

Zack was going to penetrate him with something much bigger now. _Much _bigger.

"Cody, tell me if it hurts. Please, if you feel any discomfort, tell me," Zack pleaded.

Cody nodded, waiting for the entrance of Zack's erection.

This was it.

Could Cody handle all this?

Zack grabbed Cody's inner thighs, spreading him even wider, and then placed the tip of his cock at Cody's entrance.

Cody could feel the thickness of it, and he knew it was going to be painful.

Zack then idly lapsed his erection inside Cody.

Cody bit his hand tightly, thrusting his head back.

Zack stopped, waiting. A few moments, after the harsh breaths from Cody subsided, he continued.

He buried himself deep inside Cody; all the way to the base. He stared there for many moments, reveling in the heat and tightness of his brother.

There was so much pressure on him; he felt as though he would break in half. But it was so good! The heat was practically sizzling him; it was so hot that it made his whole body burn.

Just being inside him; it was a numbing pleasure.

Cody felt as though he was being split in half. A pain racked up his spine, and he thought it would literally break under the pressure. He let out harsh gasps, becoming blind in the anguish he was being succumbed too.

But....

The pain slowly subsided as he became used to the object filling him.

After many minutes, he was sure he would be fine if Zack moved.

"Z-zack...!," he called. He slowly opened one of his tightly closed eyes to look at his brother.

"Ma-move...."

"Are you sure?"

"No...but to it anyway."

Quite reluctantly, Zack slid out of him, and then slid out of him. Cody winced, but then blew it off.

This wasn't so bad....

Noticing the reaction in his brother, Zack continued to fuck him. He rolled his hips, and his cock rammed softly inside him.

After many minutes, the agony started to subside.

Cody started helping, sliding himself into the fucking process every time Zack pushed in him.

Zack started to pick up a quicker pace, and Cody started tilting his head back in pleasure, moaning.

No, Cody could not handle this.

Cody yelped when a vision bleeped into his mind.

_The greasy hands grabbed Cody's black hair, clenching onto it so tightly that some even ripped out his scalp. "No!," Cody cried. The man pressed the cock to the boys mouth, but Cody refused to open his lips. Finally, the man became annoyed and he deliberatly _shoved _his massive cock into Cody's. He started fucking Cody's mouth, gagging him. _

Tears sprang alive out of Cody's eyes, and he screamed. "No! No!"

_A large cock rammed itself into Cody's whole, keeping a quick pace. Cody moaned in pain, tears streaking down his cheeks along with his eyeliner. The man fucked him restlessly until he shoved his cock deep inside of Cody's anus and groaned savagely as his cream filled Cody up. _

"Let go of me! Please! No!"

Zack quickly took himself out of Cody. This is what he had feared.

"_Suck me, bitch! Suck me or I'll go find your brother and make HIM fuck my cock!" Cody had do. Cody opened his mouth wide and took in the guys cock. He went all the way to the base and back. He had to save his brother...he had to. Cody didn't matter; only his brother. Apparently, the man didn't like the speed. He grabbed a-hold of Cody's head and started forcing him to go faster. The man's cock hit against the back of his throat, successfully choking him. Moments later, the man held Cody there up to the base as he came inside Cody. It was so _disgusting. _"Drink it, 'fuckin slut. Drink my cock's precious gift." Cody almost threw up when he swallowed the grissly substance. Tears streamed down his eyes. _

Cody started thrashing around, his arms going wild and voice heigtening it's volume. To muffle him, Zack placed his hand inside Cody's mouth. Cody bit down hard on Zack's hand, and Zack cursed silently, his eyesight going blind in pain for a second. Cody then started chewing on Zack's hand. Zack listened for any sign of his mother waking, but there weren't any.

'Thank you lord,' he praised god.

A few moments later, Cody stopped moving—including eating Zack's hand.

Cody's eyes slowly fluttered open, revealing himself to a darkness.

Immediately, Zack embraced his brother, holding him tightly in his arms.

"Z-Zack....?," Cody questioned.

Tears slipped out of Zack's tear ducts. "I am so sorry!," he cried to his brother. "I am so sorry!"

Those were the only words he could say, just like last time.

Cody sat in his embrace, and the memories started flooding back to him as Zack cried in his shoulder.

_I'm a monster, _Cody realized. _An abomination. _

_I deserve to die. _

* * *

Cody stood upon the Tipton Hotel roof, staring out into the city beneath him.

His eyes were glazed over with emotions that were undescribable. There _were _no emotions.

Cody's eyes were empty.

_I'm so sorry! I'm so sorry! _

Those words stained Cody's heart; ripped his soul into pieces. Shredded them into bits, burned them into ashes. Blew them into the atmosphere, crushed them from existence.

Cody....he was a monster. He was the devil himself. He didn't deserve to live.

Cody looked down. There was a strait way down—no balconies no nothing. Then, there was the road and cars.

It was such a long way down.......a long, long, long way......

And all Cody needed was one step. One step, and he'd be dead.

Like he should be.

Because he's an abomination.

Cody's foot started to glide forward, right aver the edge of the roof.

"Cody?"

Cody's head snapped around, and he saw Zack.

Zack stared at him and shock and horror. Was Cody about to do what he think he was about to do?!

"Zack—"

Cody was immediately cut off. Anger boiled inside Zack, and he took a step towards his brother. "Cody _why_?!," Zack all but screamed. "Why are you doing this?! No! Why were you about to do that?! I'm not going to let you go Cody!"

_I'm not going to let you go, Cody! _

'I've cursed him, haven't i? I've made him love me. I made him care about me.'

Cody's heart burned. 'This is all my fault.'

Cody's eyes lowered, and he slid his foot back more, letting his heal go over the edge into the air. Tears stung Cody's eyes before they actually streaked down. "Tell mom I'm sorry," Cody began. "Tell her I'm sorry that she birthed someone like me."

Zack's eyes widened. No. "Cody do—"

"Zack, I love you," Cody whispered. His foot slid off the roof, and the cause of pressure from gravity caused him to fall back.

It was like everything was going in slow motion.

A tear was struck by the sunlight making it gleam. A small, sad smile glimmered upon Cody's beautiful face. "I'm sorry."

"NO!," Zack screamed wildly, running forth his falling brother who was now successfully in the air fully. "CODY I LOVE YOU!"

Cody's eyes widened as those words entered his lips. Then, he felt pressure. He was going to die. There was no going back. He was seriously about too—!

Then, Cody was floating.

But there was a pain. In his arm.

Cody looked up, to see Zack, who was half over the building. Their hands were clasped tightly together.

Cody's eyes widened to orbs. "Z...ack..."

Tears splashed upon Cody's face. Zack's tears. "Don't leave me," Zack cried. "I want to save you. Please don't leave me. Please don't let me go. Cody, I love you."

_I love you_.

Those three words. Cody's wide eyes slowly lowered till they shut, letting themselves being admitting to blackness.

Cody let go.

Zack screamed his lungs out as he watched his brother fall to his death. Petrified screams filled the area below them as they watch the teenage boy fall.

Then,

Crash.

Blood.

Dead

Save Me, I'm Lost.

Oh Lord I've been waiting for you.

I'll pay any cost,

Just save me from being confused.

Just show me what I'm looking for

-

And now, I've found what I've been looking for.

I'm not confused

And i payed what i had to

I waited for him

And he saved me from the loss i had been embedded in.

**-The End-**

_-Submitted Wednesday July 29th 2009: 3:00 am-_


	4. Epilouge

Please Review:

IF YOU WANT TO FEEL DEPRESSED, DO **NOT** READ THIS. THIS IS A GOOD EPILOGUE

**

* * *

Epilogue

* * *

**

_7 Years Later _

Beep. Beep. Beep. Beep.

Zack yawned as he sat up, tapping his alarm clock and shutting it off. He looked around his suite room for many moments before he sighed, standing up.

Only wearing plaid boxers, Zack grabbed a large, fuzzy brown blanket and wrapped it around him, admitting himself to warmth.

Though his heart still felt ice cold.

Zack stumbled out of his suite room into his large living room that happened to be connected to the kitchen.

Zack no longer stayed at the Tipton—actually, he moved around to much _to _have a home. This room was just another apartment room he would move out of in the next few months.

It had a full view of Boston; there were floor to ceiling windows and a plasma screen television with HD and HBO. There was a large curving black leather couch facing the t.v that Zack had, of course, forgot to turn off.

Zack sighed, walking over to the kitchen. He ran his fingers against the marble counter tops before he walked over to his refrigerator.

It was stocked with vitamin water and allot of healthy foods. It was rare for Zack to eat fattening foods nowadays. It just...didn't seem right

Zack pulled out a orange vitamin water and then a granola bar which he had no clue why was in the refrigeration system.

Sighing once more, Zack flopped onto his couch, staring at his windows. The sun was just starting to come up, birds were starting to fly.

Zack didn't know why he actually came here, but he did. Actually, he knew why, but he saw no point of it. Cody was gone. All there was is his grave.

Cody's not here fo Zack to say "Happy Birthday!"

And since it was Cody's birthday, then it was Zack's birthday too. But Zack was not in the least in his birthday spirit. He was never in a positive spirit, though.

Even though Zack had reached his dream of becoming someone famous, it was just dull now. He didn't care at all.

Zack was a world renowned skateboarder, but it meant nothing to him. It was just..._nothing_. He didn't care about the yellow, blue, red carpet. He didn't care about the crazy fans. He didn't care about the interviews or the movies he was starting to become apparent in(apparently he could act too). He didn't care about the riches he was now embedded in. It was all just a black hole.

Cody was everything to Zack, but he was gone. He wanted to die; to join his brother in heaven.

Zack breathed heavily before he turned on the news channel.

Of course, he was the front story. They were talking about the movie he would recently star in, and then rumors about Zack modeling.

Zack wasn't modeling, so yes, these were just crazy rumors.

Zack breathed heavily and then took a shower, cleaning himself thoroughly, though the deepest cuts were never cleaned. He still felt Cody's sweat on his hands; Cody's salty tears. And the blood.

It seemed like a curse now, but Zack never wanted the curse to go away.

Zack had seen a therapist after Cody's death, but then Carrie, the one who forced him to go, died two years later of lung disease.

Zack stopped going, so now he lived in a fake life. Fake grins. Fake emotions. Fake faces.

All _fake_.

Zack cleaned the dirt and dust off his body and then shaved and trimmed all the important places.

He dressed in dark jeans and a brown turtle neck. Then, he put on a very thick, yet comfortable coat.

Having growing all the way to 6'2, all this looked extremely well on Zack. But Zack didn't care.

Zack decided he would skip his stylist today—he really didn't care about his hat at the current moment.

Zack tied a scarf around his neck and pushed on his shoes, biting into the granola bar he had forgotten about. He let the barely eaten snack on the counter and then grabbed his vitamin water.

Over the years, it had become much colder in the northern areas. Snow was more frequent during the winter.

During their birthday. (A/N: I feel as though their spring babies, but i like snow!)

Zack pulled a hat to cover his features.

Then, he walked out of his apartment, letting the door close and lock behind him automatically.

Zack pulled out his phone from his jacket pocket and flipped it open.

A black and white picture of Cody and Zack as teens was planted on the screen, making Zack remember how much of an utter failure he was.

Zack stared at the picture for a while before he flipped his phone shut and pushed it back into his pocket.

He walked out onto the white streets of boston. He was immediately hit with a chilling wind, making his face glow bright pink from the coldness.

Zack wished he had put on his gloves, but he had forgotten them, like usual. Zack opened the vitamin water and took a sip.

The watery substance slicked down his throat, and Zack sighed heavily when he stopped gulping it down.

He threw the empty bottle away when he reached the subway. He bought a ticket and then went onto the long car-ish thing.

He took a seat in the back, knowing he would be sitting there for a few minutes. Luckily, no one was really out right now, which was slightly surprising due to the fact that it was almost Christmas time. Maybe the god that wasn't real was shining it's fake light upon him.

Zack didn't believe in anybody but himself and Cody now.

When the subway reached his stop, Zack got off.

After he got off the subway area he walked through the streets till he reached his wished area.

He walked into the flower shop which was ice cold.

Zack shuddered and walked up to the cash register.

"I ordered a black rose," he said.

The male nodded, and he smiled at Zack, flashing his white teeth.

Zack didn't pay attention.

He paid and left with the black rose, leaving the registeree pissed.

Zack was relieved no one had noticed him; he wasn't bothered.

Zack walked his way to the next place he would be staying at for a few hours.

Cody wasn't cremated. Cody was buried in a church even though he didn't believe in god.

Zack walked into the church, ignoring the priest. He walked through to the gate, and the priest didn't follow him.

That's when Zack saw it.

Cody's grave.

It was black marble, and it was sitting above the ground, unlike the others.

Zack's heart tugged at his chest painfully, sending ripples of emotions through Zack.

Zack walked over to Cody's grave. It was alone; no one beside it. Int the front of the casket was a large, long rectangular white marble piece that went five feet up in the air.

Names of places were on the marble;

Australia. China. Japan. England. Belgium. Germany. Croatia. Fiji. Egypt. Jordan. South Korea.

The list went on and on. It was all places that Zack had been too. Because Cody loved traveling. He loved learning and seeing different things and going to places.

Zack pulled out an instrument that could carve into the marble. Carefully, he started to list thirteen places which he had toured in.

Iraq. Iran. Moldova. Qatar. Syria. Wales. Yemen. Zaire. Uganda. Turkey. Samoa. Peru. Slovakia.

Zack stopped carving and clicked the instrument shut, returning it to his pocket.

Carefully, he placed the black rose on the grave before he found himself unable to walk, collapsing to his knees.

Zack didn't know how long he stayed there with his head bowed, tears swimming out of his eyes. It could've been minutes. Hours. Days. Months. Years.

He didn't know. His heart hurt to much. He wished he could've died. He should've been in Cody's place. He was the older brother. He should have taken it all.

It was all his fault.

"You know," A voice suddenly said, causing Zack's head to snap up.

A male with long black hair with green eyes stood in front of him. He was wearing normal winter clothing, and his cheeks were bright pink from the coldness. He looked about Zack's age.

He had a black rose in his hand too.

"It's not your fault."

Zack stared at him. The male suddenly smiled wide, and he placed the rose on Cody's grave.

The man kneeled down to Zack, looking him strait in the eyes. "You couldn't have prevented it."

"Who are you?," Zack asks.

"One of Cody's friends."

"I've never seen you before."

"That's the point," The man said, winking.

Zack had now clue how this guy could be so cheerful while he was so depressed.

The man suddenly grabbed Zack's hand, pulling him up.

"My name is Caden," the man said. "I've been watching you sit there for five hours."

_He was watching me for that long?_

"Are you a stalker?," Zack asks.

"No. Just a friend."

"I can't be a friend with someone I've never met."

"Your depressed."

Zack doesn't reply, and a depressing silence goes between them.

Zack stares at the floor, feeling depressed again.

Caden, who has already let go, sighs and tilts his head back, looking at the sky.

Snow flakes fall onto his face, and he blinks any away that reach his eyes.

"I was a transfer student at your school. No one liked me. Cody came up to me and said hi. It was the only time i talked to him"

"Then how were you guys friends?," Zack asks, generally curious.

Caden shrugs. "I consider people who are nice to me are friends. So...I was very sad when he died. And i learned that you had 'dropped' him. But i don't believe that."

"You don't?"

Caden shook his head. "Nope, Cody let go."

Zack was shocked. He was rendered speechless, so Caden continued.

"I knew stuff was happening to him, but i didn't do anything. I should've, but i didn't. And now he's dead. Kinda sad."

Anger boiled inside Zack, and he fisted the front of Caden's shirt. "How can you say '_kinda sad_'. How can you act so carefree and happy about this all? He's _dead!_"

All humor was gone from Caden's face. He looked straitly into Zack's. "He's. Dead."

Zack's eyes widened. _He's dead_.

It's like the whole world came crashing down on him. All these walls that Zack had no clue where built. Zack had secluded himself from the truth. He'd been lying to himself all these years.

"He's not coming back," Caden continued. "No matter what you think, do, or say, he's not coming back to life."

Zack's fingers had loosened, so Caden took a step back. Zack was staring at him, but actually, he wasn't even in this world. His mind was being opened to this whole other universe of understanding.

Caden sighed heavily and placed his hand on Zack's shoulder, looking past him. "Let it go."

Then, Caden let go of Zack, walking away.

He was at the gates when he heard a thump. He paused.

Zack fell to his knees as all these emotions flooded through them.

His teeth chattered, but not from the coldness. He was trying to hold everything back, but he couldn't.

He was being smothered with all these feelings and he couldn't hold it inside. The bottle was spilling.

It was becoming to unbearable.

Tears rolled onto his cheeks, and his clenched the ground.

He screamed.

* * *

Zack sat at the bar of a coffee shop, shivering with the coldness from outside.

It was Christmas eve; no one was really out.

Zack was wrapped in his coat and scarf, and he was waiting.

A steaming cappuccino was in front of his, just recently put there.

Zack finally sighed and pulled out the card that had somehow been put in his pocket.

It said to meet here at seven thirty, but Caden wasn't here....

Had Zack just been punked?

Zack groaned as he found himself slipping into depression again. He buried his head in his arms, thinking how much of a fuck up he is.

Then, a gloved hand was placed on his shoulder, causing his head to snap up.

Caden was there, smiling widely.

"Hey," he greeted, sitting down.

"Hi," Zack replied.

Caden ordered a drink, and then rested his cheek on his palm, staring at Zack.

"It's not easy for you being out in public," he concluded, noticing the glasses Zack was wearing.

Zack shook his head. "Not really."

Caden grabbed the drink that was being held out to him and sipped it before he yelped, setting it down quickly and reached for an ice cube.

Zack watched in...amusement?...as Caden slipped the cube into his mouth, breathing heavily.

"Oooooooooooouuuuuuuuuuuuch!," he whined a few seconds later.

Zack found his lips twitching upward into a smile, but that was quickly gone when Caden looked at him again.

"So," he said. "How's it going?"

"Fine," Zack replied. This whole thing was completely awkward. He had no clue what to say.

A silence split between him. Zack grabbed his drink and sipping it carefully, not wanting to burn his tongue. He set it down with a clink, and then folded his hands together, feeling weird.

Finally, Caden sighed. "I don't expect you to immediately fall in love with me."

Zack grimaced, and Caden continued.

"But....I _would _like it if you could give me a chance."

Zack didn't reply. His whole mind was buzzing with thoughts and feelings. _What about Cody? I said i would love only Cody but does Cody really want me to waste my life like that? I cant just....but Cody...._

"You don't have to reply," Caden said finally, and all conversation was lost.

Zack sipped at his drink, and he listened to the crackling fire beside him. And for the first time in seven years, he actually felt......nice.

**-The End Of Epilogue-**

_-Submitted_ _6:00 pm August 6__th__ 09-_


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